Nichole Anderson found out she was pregnant, she would take her boyfriend's hand and lay it across her stomach. "Can you feel our baby growing inside me?" she longed to say. But he would snatch his hand away. He wanted Anderson to get an abortion. Their wedding would be in September, nine months away. It was enough to prepare himself to become a husband, let alone a father.
After the abortion, the baby’s father left her. Anderson felt increasingly alone. She slit her wrists but survived. A friend told her about a crisis pregnancy center in downtown Richmond, where she met other women who felt devastated by their abortions.
Slowly, her psychological torment began to ease. She stated, "I don't want another woman to have to feel this," she says, explaining her decision to discuss her abortion. "It's time for women as a group to stand up and say 'This hurts me.' "
U.S. News & World Report
Who gets abortions and why:1-19-1998
I had strong desires to cut myself while cooking
Liane’s Story: Following my second abortion…The next ten years were difficult and painful-but I never knew why. I just knew something was wrong, and on many occasions, I felt like committing myself to a mental hospital. For years I had strong desires to cut myself while cooking, and when I did I passed it off as accidents. I had to fight with myself to control my car because I wanted to crash into the side of the freeway wall.
The Jericho Plan, Breaking down the walls, which prevent post-abortion healing
by: David C. Reardon
I became deeply depressed and suicidal
Brittany: "Terminating a pregnancy, I was told, is no more significant than removing a tiny blood clot in my uterus. Sounded harmless, I reasoned; so, exercising my right, I opted for abortion. At that time, no other options; such as adoption or single parenting, were explained to me.
Had I been counseled properly concerning the pain I would feel and the facts about the development of my unborn child, I doubt that I would have chosen abortion. I was not forewarned of the health risks or the deep psychological after-effects of abortion. I was a bright college student and had a promising future ahead of me.
But following my abortion I became deeply depressed and suicidal. I had never mourned the loss of my appendix, so why did I grieve over the passing of this "uterine blob"? The answer is, of course, that it wasn't a mere "blob of tissue." This was a living baby, and I realized this the moment I saw his dismembered body - but I realized it too late."
TeenBreaks.com
Suicidal when my babies should have been born
Un-Named: "I wasn’t told that it would become impossible to look at my own eyes in the mirror. Or that my confidence would be so shaken that I would become unable to make important life decisions. My self-hatred kept me from pursuing my goal of becoming a nurse. I didn’t think I deserved success. I wasn’t told that I would come to hate all those who advised me to have my abortions, because they were my accomplices in the murders of my babies. I wasn’t told that having an abortion with my husband’s consent would cause me to hate the father of my children, or that I would be unable to sustain any satisfying, lasting, and fulfilling relationships.
I wasn’t told that I could become suicidal in the fall of every year, when both of my babies should have been born. I wasn’t told that on the birthdays of my living children, I would remember the two for whom I would never make a birthday cake, or that on Mother’s Day I would remember the two who never send me a card, or that every Christmas I would remember the two for whom there would be no presents. My abortions were supposed to be a "quick-fix" for my problems, but they didn’t tell me there is no "quick-fix" for regrets."
The Jericho Plan, Breaking down the walls, which prevent post-abortion healing
by: David C. Reardon
They never told me I'd have suicidal thoughts
Rachel: "I Had My abortion when I was 19. No one explained to me that I would undergo so many emotional, psychological, and mental after effects. By the way, I was chosen in a class of 30 students as "the most stable."
Those people at the clinic, though, never told me about the beginning of life, of the fetus growing. They just told me about the "blob of tissue" to be vacuumed out. They never told me about the depression, anger, anxiety, fears, and self-hatred that I would experience after the abortion. They didn't tell me I would lose sleep and my appetite for weeks or continue to be uneasy around babies, children, pregnant women and people in general because I thought I was such a terrible person. They never told me I'd hate myself, that I'd have suicidal thoughts. But the saddest thing for anyone affected by abortion - the saddest thing is that it's irreversible."
TeenBreaks.com
I tried to kill myself three times after abortion
Ann "I became emotionally numb, I tried to kill myself three times."
Federal Document ClearingHouse Congressional Testimony, Senate Commerce
Science and Transportation: 3-3-2004
My self-hatred began after that first abortion
Karen: "Immediately after the abortion, nothing mattered to me, school, my life. I had very low self-esteem. It was nine years after that first abortion just three years after the second, that I began to realize that all the years of substance abuse, low self esteem, suicidal tendencies, and self hatred began after that first abortion."
Federal Document ClearingHouse Congressional Testimony, Senate Commerce
Science and Transportation:3-3-2004
If my baby had to die I would die too
Lisa: "By the time I got pregnant, we had been dating on and off for 9 months. I wanted to get pregnant because his ex-girlfriend kept coming around claiming she had his baby and he was thinking of going back to her. I thought if I had his baby he would stay with me and maybe he would start treating me better and we could be together forever. …
By the time I realized I was pregnant, the baby was 8 weeks along. I was scared to death because my Dad had always told me if anything like this ever happened he would kick me out of the house and disown me. I thought my boyfriend would protect me and our baby but that didn’t happen. He told his parents who then wanted to talk to me about what we were going to do.
Knowing so little about the developing person inside me, his mom convinced me it was just a blob of tissue that didn’t look anything like a human and we had to get me an abortion as quick as possible before it got too big to abort. She said her son had a whole life ahead of him and how I should be able to understand that he couldn’t be tied down to me and a baby so early in his life. And anyway, if I did give birth, she said I was too young to be a good mother and they would get custody of my child so I would never see it again. She offered to put up some money for the abortion, but I would have to pay it back in time.
I panicked. Never had the idea of killing my child crossed my mind. Not for a second. I was only 14 at the time, but even then I knew this was so very wrong. I wanted to die: I had hit rock bottom and if my baby had to die I would die too. I tried to think of the least painful way to die: hang myself, turn on my Dad’s car and let it run in the garage? I didn’t know how to tie a noose or start a stick shift car, and no one I knew owned any guns. I tried cutting my wrists but there didn’t seem to be anything sharp enough and it hurt too much; I felt like a weak little failure. I couldn’t even kill myself!
The regret: The morning of my abortion, I sobbed silently in the shower. I jabbed my belly with my finger and called my baby a parasite, trying to distance myself from what I was about to do. My heart wasn’t in those words but I knew if I was going to have to do this I had to do everything I could to keep my mind from envisioning a little face that would never be. I found out later in my junior year health class that my baby had developed to the point of looking like a person with arms, legs, and a head, and could feel pain. That will haunt me for the rest of my life. My baby’s name is Natalie and she would have been born in November. She would be almost 8 years old now and going into the 3rd grade. I wonder sometimes if she would have been blond like me, if she would have liked to draw and paint. I would trade every success and milestone in my life to have her back. On this earth I will never be able to hold her, kiss her good night, or tell her I’m sorry. I wish I’d had the courage to stand up for Baby Natti."
Silent no more awareness campaign, testimonies
Abortion causes suicide
In an interview of post-abortive women in Kentucky: Seven of the eight women said they had considered suicide over their abortion.
NY Times: Some Abortion Foes Forgo Politics for Quiet Talk
By John Leland: 1-16-2006
I was so misled
Becki: blamed the abortion industry for her guilt and depression, for fostering a sanitized view among young women that ending a pregnancy was as simple as ending a toothache. "I was so misled, and since then I have dealt with so much regret and depression. The things that I did to myself to punish myself for the mistakes I made, it was life-altering. When you're scared, you're so trusting and believing in what they're telling you. ... They make you feel this is a mistake that can be corrected on your lunch hour."
Springfield News-Leader Abortion
Is 24-hour wait fair? 8-17-2003
